Lawyers are just people. And some of my favorite people happen to be lawyers. Heck, it's the most common occupation of my customer base. But every once in a while, I talk to a lawyer that really makes me want to vomit on his (or her) face. You know the ones- they passed the bar exam and are really cool. See, they drive a BMW. Can't you see how cool and rich they are? And the bar exam... man, that must be hard. So many brilliant lawyers out there. Way smarter than us normal, common folk. We the dumb people. Need lawyers to help us understand.

So this fool walks in to the coffeeshop and asks me the status on the Starbucks issue. I tell him. I'm probably not supposed to put this out on the internet, but I'm going to tell you too.

They stopped sending me letters and have resorted to calling. They said that they're not anti- small business. They understand my position and they think I have some good points. They are just "policing" their trademark. So they changed their mind. They want to settle this thing in a reasonable way, so all they're asking now is that I put a space between Double and Shot, and they'll pay to have everything changed. Hmm. Let me think about that. What does that mean?

Now back to the fool lawyer. I told him that's unacceptable. They're obviously backing down and asking me to do something arbitrary because they know I'm right, yet they still want it to look like they were right. He said something about "Sam Bucks." Said that judges don't like to make new law. They just like to look at the precedent and make decisions based on that. He told me not to look a gift horse in the mouth. "I told you how to win this case a long time ago, but you didn't listen to me." And then he told me, "You're a bright guy, and make good coffee, but you're not an expert in everything. You don't know law."

Let me say this. Of all the people in the entire world, I know more about THIS case and the law involved than anyone. I know the history. I know the laws involved. I know how they relate to the coffee industry specifically. I know how they relate to the descriptive term "DOUBLESHOT." I know why I'm right.

See, Mr. Generic Lawyer, back when Starbucks first applied for this trademark, the USPTO told them they needed a disclaimer stating "No claim is made to the exclusive right to use 'DOUBLESHOT' apart from the mark as shown." The controversy here is that the USPTO withdrew that requirement after receiving a letter from Starbucks that is full of misstatements and prevarication. In one section of this letter, Starbucks' lawyers state that they already own the trademark "DOUBLE SHOT" for "use in connection with closely related goods." (I'm not sure chocolate and candy are "closely related goods," but I'm not a lawyer, so what do I know.) They go on to say that the space between "double" and "shot" is an "immaterial difference" between the two marks.

Seems like, once again, some lawyers didn't do their homework.
Some lawyers piss me off.
Hey generic lawyer, don't try to make me look stupid; you're not that smart. Nice pink shirt.

Wow. I don't recommend racing in a triathlon if you haven't swum in a few years. Not a good idea. But somehow, I didn't drown. It's like riding a bike, only it's in the water and you move your arms a lot, and you could drown.
DoubleShot hit the races this past weekend. I raced in the Tulsa Triathlon and Josh raced in the Turkey Mountain bike race. It was a fun day, despite being out of shape and on a mountain bike. If you look at the picture of the swim, I'm the one in the middle with the lazy left arm.
As my dad always told me, "you may not be good, but you sure are slow."
It was really cool being out there because people are starting to see us at a lot of races, and DoubleShot is getting some recognition. Over 200 athletes walked away with DoubleShot water bottles on Sunday, and I was excited to see them in people's cages as we rode. I'm currently working on DoubleShot jerseys, and maybe soon we'll have our own team!
We are also working on an off-road duathlon that we will put on in September here in Tulsa. Stay tuned, it's going to be a blast.
DoubleShot Coffee's on the warpath.

Last weekend I went to a series of criterium races here in Tulsa. It was called Tulsa Tough, and there were races Friday night, all day Saturday and all day Sunday. I have never watched live pro cycling, and I was inspired. These guys and ladies are intense. They are great athletes, and extremely hard workers. I was really impressed with the efforts and focus. It inspired me. Made me want to go buy a road bike and start racing. Which is really saying something, because in general I think roadies are a bunch of posers (sorry guys). I know there is no way I could ride as fast as the pros I watched on Sunday- and that impresses me. So a big congrats to everyone who raced. I met some really nice people from San Francisco- hello to Shelley and Rob. I wish I could come ride in California for a few days. (I need a vacation!)
I sponsored some DoubleShot Coffee at Sunday's race, which went in front of my apartment. It was a good opportunity to spend the day outside, tooling around on my mountain bike.
This Sunday I'll be at Tulsa Triathlon at Skiatook Lake with coffee. I'm sponsoring that race and the mountain bike race at Turkey Mountain. Busy weekend. Was hoping to race, but don't think I'll be able to make it out to Turkey in time, and I haven't swum in a couple years, so the triathlon is probably a bad idea.
Other than race sponsorships, all has been quiet here. Business is a little slow, so if you've not been buying coffee, it's time to jump back on the wagon.
Big pat on the back to Malcolm for putting on Tulsa Tough, and to Keith, Matt, Ryan, Chad, Mike, Scott, and all the other local guys who raced.
www.TulsaTough.com